Most jokes are considered generally stupid, and that does not mean the person reading them is also stupid. It just means you have a sense of humour. Read these jokes that are so stupid that they're actually funny.
1. What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
2. I had to sell my vacuum cleaner...
...Because it was just collecting dust.
3. And the Lord said unto John, “come forth and receive eternal life.”
But John came fifth and won a toaster.
4. What’s the stupidest animal in the jungle?
A polar bear.
5. Why should you stand in the corner if you get cold?
It’s always 90 degrees.
6. I stayed in a hotel where the towels were so thick, I could hardly close my suitcase.
7. - Hey, you lost a lot of weight.
- No, I gave birth two weeks ago.
- To a baby?
8. What word is always spelled incorrectly?
9. As he trained troops at Fort Dix, New Jersey, my brother-in-law noticed that one medic was hopeless on the firing range.
"You better learn how to fire your weapon," he told her. "All soldiers have to qualify on the range before we can send them to Iraq."
The medic was relieved. "Then it’s okay," she said. "I’m not going to Iraq. I’m going to Baghdad."
10. A man is on trial for armed robbery. The jury comes back with the verdict.
The foreman stands, clears his throat, and announces, "Not guilty."
The defendant leaps to his feet. "Awesome!" he shouts. "Does that mean I get to keep the money?"
11. My niece was thrilled to hear that a new car wash was opening up in her neighbourhood.
"How convenient," she said."I can walk to it."
12. Spanish never came easily to my sister. Still, she did her best to communicate with the Spanish-speaking staff at the restaurant she managed. But when she made mistakes—and she made a lot—she’d apologize by saying, "Me estúpido."
Finally, a staffer took pity on her. "Susanna, you’re not estúpido," she said, bucking up my sister’s ego. "You are a woman," she continued. "So you are estúpida."
13. Fresh from a visit to the dentist, I decided to stop at my bank.
Barely able to enunciate, I told the teller, “I’m sorry about not speaking more clearly. I’ve had Novocaine.”
“You should have used the drive-through,” she said.
“Everyone who goes through sounds like that,” she explained.
14. An aching back sent me stumbling to the drugstore for relief.
After a search, I found what I was looking for: a selection of heating pads specifically for people with back pain—all on the bottom shelf.
15. One time I advised my mom while she was painting a picture.
I said: "Embrace your imperfect mistakes."
She hugged me moments later.
16. Why do communists only write using lower case letters?
Because they hate capitalism.
17. What does a sprinter eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
18. I have a superpower. I can detect Indian flatbread in a 5-mile radius.
My friends call it naan-sense.
19. My mom told me to put the cat out.
I would have done it earlier if I knew it was on fire.
20. What streets do ghosts haunt?