The 40 Best Thanksgiving Jokes

Spend the best Thanksgiving laughing at these Thanksgiving jokes with your loved ones
Thanksgiving Jokes

Thanksgiving jokes

Thanksgiving is a special time of year and one of the happiest in the USA. We usually spend it with family and our loved ones and play games and have fun times together. Make them even better sharing these Thanksgiving jokes that will crack you up.

1What do you call a running turkey? Fast food.

2What kind of music did the Pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock.

3There’s always something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. Even if it’s just not being a turkey.

4What's the best song to sing when preparing your Thanksgiving turkey? All About That Baste.

5What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

6What do you call a pilgrim’s vocabulary? Pilgrammar.

7What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner? Your nose.

8Why did the cranberries turn red? Because they saw the turkey dressing.

9What do you get when you crossbreed a turkey with a harp? A bird who can pluck itself.

10The meal isn’t over when I’m full, the meal is over when I hate myself.

11What do Thanksgiving and Halloween have in common? One has gobblers, the other goblins.

12What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport? Squash.

13What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a ghost? A poultrygeist.

14What key has legs and can’t open doors? A turkey.

15What usually comes at the end of Thanksgiving? Traditionally, the letter G.

16What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? The turkey trot.

17What happens when you seriously overstuff yourself with turkey at Thanksgiving? You have a few slices of pumpkin pie.

18My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I told them I couldn't quit "cold turkey.”

19Why do pilgrims’ pants always fall down? Because they wear their belt buckles on their hats.

20What does Dracula call Thanksgiving? Fangs-giving.

21Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected fowl play.

22Why couldn’t the Thanksgiving entertainment band perform? Somebody had eaten the drumsticks.

23What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving? Lucky.

24Every Thanksgiving I think about how much Pilgrims had to sacrifice just so we could have a day off work.

25What’s the link between turkeys and teddies? Stuffing. Lots of stuffing.

26Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Yes, of course! A building can’t jump at all.

27What can never ever be eaten for Thanksgiving dinner? Thanksgiving breakfast.

28What do jazzy people put on their potatoes at Thanksgiving? Groovy.

29Why did the turkey refuse dessert? He was stuffed.

30Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside.

31How do you keep Thanksgiving Day guests from falling asleep on your couch? Infuse the gravy with cocaine.

32Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn't chicken.

33What’s the easiest way to catch a turkey? Ask a friend to toss one at you.

34What is the best Thanksgiving cookie? One baked with May-flour.

35On Thanksgiving dinner, most of us turn into hipsters. We all go out of our way to eat the turkey before it is cool.

36What’s the best way to deal with a turkey? Have it killed and then cran-bury it.

37You think you’re crazy about Thanksgiving? You’ve got nothing on the turkeys. When Thanksgiving approaches, they literally lose their heads!

38Happy Turkey Day, America! Don't forget to name the turkey and make everyone uncomfortable.

39You don't need Thanksgiving to hate your family.

40Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? It had 24 carrots.